Manipulate – Do you unwittingly do this?

manipulate

Do you ever take some one for granted? They will do what you want – so no worries.  You may feel okay about this but there may be signs of discontent from the other person – whether this is your spouse or child at home or colleague or subordinate at work. You suspect they may … Continue reading Manipulate – Do you unwittingly do this?

Resentful – How can I stop this feeling?

resentful

I suppose it is natural for us to feel resentful when others demean us, frustrate us or do us harm. I feel resentful about how Sharon spoke to me. Not what she said, but how she said it – shouting and slamming the phone down. It’s not as if this were a one-off: there have … Continue reading Resentful – How can I stop this feeling?

Build trust — How to help my organisation.

Build trust

Do you trust senior members of your organisation to get it right or to be a credible source of information? Do you trust the constant stream of commercial messages and political spin to which you are exposed.  What can be done to help to build trust? Benefits of trust within an organisation and community Organisational … Continue reading Build trust — How to help my organisation.

Cynical or too trusting? Where is a happy medium?

Not cynical

In the fairy tale The Adventures of Pinocchio, the title character is the opposite of cynical. He is a gullible puppet who is repeatedly duped by other characters. Part of his transformation, into a human being, is learning to avoid becoming too trusting, while still exercising empathy. A popular test of gullibility is to tell … Continue reading Cynical or too trusting? Where is a happy medium?

Christmas spirit – How do I foster it?

Christmas spirit

You want to experience the Christmas spirit but you feel uneasy. You will be with the relatives and in-laws, whom perhaps you don’t often see, and you want it to go well without too much family drama. But you know you will be spending a lot of time with perhaps a person or two you … Continue reading Christmas spirit – How do I foster it?

Who to trust these days?

 Who to trust

You discover that the popular celebrity you like and have enjoyed watching on television has a dark side, abusing his position to engage in predatory sexual contact with children. Not only do you feel betrayed by him but also by the broadcasters who turned a blind eye. It makes you wonder who to trust. You … Continue reading Who to trust these days?

Criticise them – But how to do so safely?

criticise

Yes it can happen. No one likes their faults to be pointed out and some with thin skins see criticism as a personal attack. They get shirty, defensive or bite back. You probably would think twice before taking the risk of saying what you really think to them. Yet keeping quiet means not doing anything about the problem.

Honesty – Is it really the best policy?

honesty

A lot of us have grown careless in what we say. “It wasn’t my fault we lost the game, I didn’t hear the whistle.” or “I was pushed over and my foot hurt.” Who has never made up an excuse to stop feeling embarrassed? This covering up may seem harmless enough but over time a … Continue reading Honesty – Is it really the best policy?

Healing presence – How to have this?

Healing presence

One of the conditions of effective counselling according to Carl Rogers is unconditional acceptance. Not judging others. Some people believe that unconditional acceptance can be a healing factor also in ordinary interactions of everyday life. For them this would involve practising forgiveness when someone hurts you, and giving encouragement to those who fail to show good behavior, and even not criticising those who do wrong.

But just how realistic is this approach?

Child rearing – What spiritual practice helps?

child rearing

Children and grandchildren can provide your child rearing with wonderful moments. Their spontaneity and sense of fun can brighten your day. But almost out of the blue all hell can break loose and they can be a real pain testing your limits and boundaries. What they want can be different from what you want. They … Continue reading Child rearing – What spiritual practice helps?